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Ask Before You Take

The gap between asking and taking

Play this lessonNarrated out loud. No account, works offline.

Also available in Spanish. The app stops after two lessons a day and suggests something to do away from the screen.

What it teaches

These are the lines the lesson comes back to, and the ones a child actually remembers afterwards.

Ask. Then wait for the word.

Your hands stay where they are.

Borrowing ends. Having doesn't.

No is an allowed answer.

Give it back better than you got it.

How it starts

This one is about other people's things. Your brother's game. Your sister's shoes. The last slice of pizza that somebody was saving. You already know you are supposed to ask — almost every kid knows that part. What nobody teaches you is the bit that actually goes wrong, and it is not the asking.

How the lesson goes

Asking someone your own size

  1. Say their name first
  2. Ask, don't announce
  3. Hands still until they answer

Two kinds of asking

  1. Borrow — say when you'll give it back
  2. Have — it's gone, so it's a bigger ask
  3. Food is almost always having

Giving it back

  1. Give it back before they ask
  2. Say thank you when you return it
  3. Say it yourself if you broke it

The question at the end

You want your sister's markers. She's right there. What's the first move?

For the grown-up

Every lesson ends by handing the child something to do off the screen, and telling you what was taught so you can use the same words.

Try this today: Ask somebody in your house for one thing today, and keep your hands completely still until they answer. Notice how long the waiting feels.

Then: Ask them whether it sounded different from the way you usually ask.

More in At Home

The whole library is free

Twenty-four narrated lessons for ages 4 to 9, in English and Spanish. No account, no sign-up, no ads, and nothing your child does in the app ever leaves the device — you can check that yourself with the network tab open. Open the lessons.